My Story

From Survival to Self-Love

My Journey as a Woman, a Mother, and a Soul in Healing

I became a mother at 17.

While most girls my age were still discovering who they wanted to be, I was already holding a tiny life in my arms, fragile, precious, and completely dependent on me. There was no manual. No clear path. No solid support system. I had just left my childhood home to live with the father of my child. We had nothing but each other, and even that would soon begin to unravel.

But my story doesn’t begin with motherhood. It begins with absence.

When I was 12, my parents left to work abroad, hoping to give me and my brother a better life. But that sacrifice came at a cost, our family fell apart. We were raised by our grandmother, a woman full of wisdom and strength. Still, I carried a deep emptiness, always longing for the presence of my parents, for the warmth of a complete family. I found comfort in my friends instead and slowly, I began to rebel. I became disobedient, reckless, and lost.

At 17, I got pregnant.

The years that followed were full of darkness.

I spent four years in an abusive relationship, physically, emotionally, and mentally broken by the man who was supposed to love me. I stayed, hoping things would change, terrified of the unknown, paralyzed by shame and fear. But one morning, I looked at my two-year-old daughter… then at myself… and whispered the word that saved me: Enough.

I chose to live.

At 21, after finally graduating from college, I made the hardest decision of my life, I left everything familiar. I left my daughter in the loving care of my grandmother and aunt, and I flew to Doha, Qatar. I became a secretary at a private center, working long hours and pushing myself beyond exhaustion. My goal was simple but powerful: to give my daughter the future she deserved.

I was constantly afraid.. afraid I wouldn’t be able to send her to college, afraid of failing her. I poured myself into my work, sacrificed my youth, and carried the entire financial burden alone. I tried dating, but nothing lasted. It wasn’t a priority, survival was. Eventually, I met someone and entered a serious relationship. We were engaged. I thought I had finally found my person… but he left without explanation. Just like that.

I remember crying out to God during those nights.
“Please don’t leave me like everyone else.”

Still, I didn’t give up.

Over 14 years, I built a life.. a decent job, a small business, enough money to stop checking price tags. I could afford luxury. I had a daughter who made me proud, a mother and brother who stood by me, and just enough peace to keep going. And yet… something still felt missing. There was a space inside me I didn’t know how to fill.

And then, in 2021, everything came crashing down.

I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety, a storm I had ignored for too long. Years of unresolved trauma, burnout, toxic relationships, and the heavy responsibility of single motherhood had taken their toll. I felt empty, exhausted, and suffocated. I started medication. I began therapy. And for the first time, I wasn’t just surviving, I was healing.

I slowly started seeing the world differently.
I began to notice the little things I used to ignore, a quiet moment, a warm breeze, a message from my mom, a hug from my brother. I started appreciating life. I learned how to live in the present. And most importantly, I learned how to love myself.

I want to thank the people who helped me through this transformation:
My psychotherapist, Zaina, and my compassionate psychiatrist, Dra. Sanabel.. you were my guiding light in the darkest moments. My mother and brother, thank you for never giving up on me, even when I gave up on myself.

They say healing isn’t linear.
It’s true. But healing is possible.

In 2023, I listened to the quiet voice inside me once more:
“You need more.”

Yes, I had money. But I didn’t have time or quality of life.
Yes, I had things. But they brought only temporary happiness.
So I took another leap of faith, I left everything again and moved to Canada, this time with my daughter by my side. She had her dreams too, to study and live abroad. We were finally chasing our dreams together.

But soon after arriving, the laws changed. I couldn’t work. My plans were suddenly on hold.
I was stuck in uncertainty.
But maybe, just maybe… God has a better plan for us.

And so I continue to live…

In the present moment.
I remembered that peace isn’t a destination, it’s a choice.
I chose to live fully, to love myself deeply, and to embrace the now. I stopped chasing the future or resenting the past. I slowed down. I healed a little more. And maybe, this time, I will fill that empty space, not with things, but with wholeness.

I am grateful and blessed, for a kind smile, a hot cup of tea, a walk in nature, a long breath.
I stopped surviving.
I started living.


This is my story. From pain to power. From survival to self-love.
If you’re reading this and you feel broken, lost, or alone, please remember:

Your story is not over.

You are allowed to start again.
You are allowed to choose yourself.
You are allowed to heal.

To my mother — thank you for never letting go, no matter how many times I drifted away.

To my brother — thank you for your strength and support.

To my daughter — thank you for being so strong, so independent. I am proud of you beyond words. I may not be a perfect mother, but I have always tried to be a better one for you. I pray you’ll always find happiness in your heart, live with gratitude, and reach every dream you carry inside you.

To my grandmother, Nanay (may you rest in peace), and to my auntie Jen  — thank you for your love and for helping care for my daughter while I worked abroad. Your support meant more than words can ever express.

To my friends, who stood beside me during that time until now. Whether they listened, reminded me to take care of myself, or simply checked in with a kind message, they made the hard days softer. Healing may be personal, but we rarely do it alone. Thank you.

To Dra. Joy (may you rest in peace) Thank you for your "sermon". You never stopped reminding me to take care of myself, even when I didn’t want to listen. You scolded me when I ignored my health, and you lovingly pushed me to get the help I truly needed. You were always smiling. Always kind. Always showing up for others with a heart full of care. You passed away last month, and I didn’t get to visit you before I left Qatar. I carry that with a heavy heart. But I want you to know, I will never forget you. You helped change the course of my life, and I’m so grateful I got to know you. Thank you for believing in me, even when I couldn’t believe in myself. I will miss you a lot.

Most of all, I thank God — for life, for strength, and for the gift of rebirth. I am no longer who I was. I am becoming whole. It feels as though I have been born again.


I love each of you with all my heart, and I’ll always be grateful for the love and light you've brought into my darkest moments.


With all my heart, thank you for being part of my journey.

– Joie
A woman, a mother, and a soul still healing… but finally living. 


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Support me on Ko-fi

☕ From the Heart, If You Wish 💛 Hello everyone, Writing and sharing my mental health journey has been a deeply personal and healing process. If you’ve found comfort, insight, or connection in my words, I want you to know that your presence here already means so much to me. That said, if you ever feel moved to support my work in a small way, I’ve set up a Ko-fi page where you can leave a tip, just like buying me a warm cup of coffee. No pressure at all. Truly. Only if it feels right to you, from the heart. Your kindness, whether through messages, shares, or tips, helps me continue doing this work with love and intention. 💛 You can visit my Ko-fi page here:  Support Me on Ko-fi ✨ Every bit of support, no matter the size, is deeply appreciated. Thank you for walking this path with me. With all my heart, -Joie
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